My name is Michelle, and I am from Scotland. I would like to tell you about my experience with Anxiety disorder and my OCD recovery. I suffered from anxiety for so long it is hard to pin-point the exact time in my life when the symptoms started. My earliest memory of feeling anxious is when I was 9 years old and still at primary school. I would have panic attacks and I remember having a constant burning feeling in my throat. Over the years the symptoms got worse until I finally found the help that I needed when I was 35 years old, over 25 years of suffering
I suffered all through high school and it really began to affect my life when at the age of 21 I dropped out of my nursing degree course as I was having panic attacks going into placements and worried about killing someone by making a medical error or letting people down within the hospital. At the time I remember blaming it on family circumstances and I still did this even up until I found The Linden Method two years ago however, now that I am recovered I now know it was purely my anxiety symptoms that caused me to leave my course.
…they included panic attacks all the time, OCD which involved switching lights on and off constantly checking things were off around the house. I also around this time developed really bad health anxiety. This was made worse as when I was having a panic attack I would have pain in my chest, convinced I was dying and felt like my throat was closing. I would also experience heart palpitations; if I had a pain anywhere I would go onto Google, search it and convince myself I had cancer or some sort of disease.
I would go to the doctor all the time even insisting I was sent for scans, of course every time they all came back clear. I suffered from depersonalisation and would walk around in a zombie type state.
I developed many physical symptoms such as digestion problems, IBS, feeling full all time, all caused by anxiety. I had a constant ringing sound in my ears and developed sensitivity to light. I would feel the need to wear sunglasses whenever I was outside. This all again added to my health anxiety, making me feel like there was something wrong with me and the doctors were wrong.
It of course affected my family and friends and had a massive affected on my relationships with them. By my mid 20’s I’d had both my children and as they were growing older my anxiety grew so much worse. I would have terrible thoughts about something bad happening to them which caused me to keep them with me most of the time. As they grew older and were becoming more aware of my behaviour I began to realise I needed help. I made the decision to speak to my GP to see if they could help me with how I was feeling. Even though I was going to the doctors with my health anxiety symptoms, I was not officially diagnosed with anxiety until my mid 20’s. This is when they decided to prescribe me medication, which after taking for a short amount of time the symptoms would reappear and this led to a long spiral of constant swapping and changing between medications.
I was told I would never fully recover from anxiety and that it was a lifelong condition and that I would need to manage my symptoms, which isn’t what I wanted. I finally got to a point at the age of 35 where I felt I needed to try and find some sort of help for this. It was stopping me living my life; my family and husband were so supportive however they were still very worried about me.
…since that young age of 9. I had the best time at The Retreat, Charles, Beth and the team really are amazing!
Hi, my name is Beth, I am director of Linden Tree Education.
You will receive unlimited, qualified support from amazing Recovery Specialists when you start the courses.
If you wish to receive guidance or support, please contact the support team through the TLM Members Portal
If you wish to book a course, please contact firstname.lastname@example.org Beth is director of Linden Recovery and course director of the Anxiety Recovery Retreat programmes.