Bullying takes on many forms and can effect people of all ages.
Bullying can be the catalyst for anxiety disorders to develop but can also lead to long-term mental health and developmental issues that can have ongoing, life-long repercussions for the victims.
We hear about bullying in the media and often the reason for the media focus is due to extreme cases where people have taken their lives, but bullies are clever, they often veil their behaviours and intimidate people in order to legitimise their attacks.
Often, bullies take control of people, even people within their families, leading them to believe that they must be compliant or face serious circumstances.
Bullies may suffer from the mental illness called narcissistic personality disorder, in which they believe that they are always ‘right’.
They may also believe that they are ‘entitled’, more important than others, intellectually more advanced, better looking and even nicer than all those around them.
These same people are often preoccupied by themselves, their sexual urges, their sexual attractiveness and their ability to perform sexually. They often use substances to control their moods, often becoming dependent on alcohol or drugs.
Bullies control their environment in order to drawer attention away from their own inadequacies and in order to regain control and power over all around them.
Scenario 1
The school bully.
An 11 year old girl came to us with cronic anxiety and OCD. She told us how an older child at school had forced her to do inappropriate things with her and how she had extorted money and posessions off her under threat of telling everyone what she had done. She reported that this bully had false evidence that made her look guilty and that despite the school’s efforts, this girl was relentless. The victim was small and pretty and smart, the bully was overweight, less attractive and not at all smart. The authorities had failed to stop the bully’s behaviour and the victim had started self-harming. At this point, the victims parents brought her to us in order to address her anxiety.
The bully felt inferior. In her mind, her jealousy of the prettier, smarter girl needed controlling and the only way to do that was to ‘own’ her. This behaviour fulfilled her.
Bullies often don’t want other people to have what they can’t have and in order to control their emotions they attempt to take away their victims liberty and their rights.
Bullies often ‘make up’ bizarre stories, lying about events, posessions and other people in order to elevate their own egos and belittle others. In extreme cases, these people start to believe their lies.
In this scenario, the authorities did, eventually, move in and the bully was dealt with and removed from the school, but in all too many cases this doesn’t happen.
We help victims of bullying of all ages to overcome the stress and anxiety before it becomes unbearable for them.
0800 069 9898 to speak to one of our qualified team
Scenario 2
The workplace bully
